Speak up, Ladies!

By Kristina Gesell

An interesting thing I recently observed while traveling back home (Russia)… I was lucky enough to spend time with my dearest friends – a great couple. They have been together for many years and are raising two wonderful baby girls. Somehow though their relationship is occasionally soured by something what is not that obvious to them. Nearly all of her frustration was a result of unmet expectations, which she had never discussed with him.

So here is a piece of advice, quite simple and yet so POWERFUL. Express your opinion on the important matters to you. It is the fundamental basis of a successful relationship.

Often held back by our own insecurities we remain silent about our simple expectations. We try to appear easygoing to make our man’s life breezy and happy. And it completely makes sense. Of course no one’s love life is only cuddles and kisses, there are many challenges where diplomacy and the ability to compromise are simply unbeatable advantages.

However, not everything needs to be negotiated or hidden deep inside marked “not important”. Compromise where you can but stand up for what is really YOUR view of a dedicated relationship. I assure you a man respects a woman who lets him know what the right way is to behave towards her.

Step 1 is acknowledging what is truly important to you. Step 2: LET HIM KNOW! Trust me, men won’t spend hours figuring out what it is that you don’t say. This is a significant difference between us. 

He will not only try, but most likely will do whatever it takes to make you happy. Of course! How else? He loves you and you are the path for him towards self-realization as a MAN.

However, if you remain silent, he thinks it’s all good and he’s THE ONE by definition since you are still with him. At this point he is so sure he does everything it takes to maintain the relationship, while your frustration and disappointment build up. And that ALL happens just because he doesn’t have a CLUE why you are unhappy.

So I encourage you, ladies, SPEAK UP! But don’t yell or insist. BE A LADY, charming and nice, yet firm.

Finally, do not forget about Step 3: be grateful and let him know you appreciate every effort of your beloved HERO.

Photo: Natasha Shannon, Ann B, Fanz Wang,